Gratitude :)

So this week I have been given the glorious title of house manager (or house bitch as I like to call it) once again. My partner in crime is Nikifor which is nice because I know this week is going to be pretty chill and no-stress. This is exactly what I need! Lately there has been some freaking out in our house because well.. We have exactly 50 days left together. This reality is something of a bother to my state of mind. I honestly don't know how I'm going to be able to function without these people. I am convinced that I am now insane and my Katima-family are the only people equipped to deal with me.. Problematic? I believe yes. How can a person go through such an experience as the one that I'm going through; with the intense rules and regulations, increasing emphasis on individuality within a group, intense ecological views and practices and still be able to go back to 'real life'? I've been worrying about this for sometime now and I'm convinced that there will be no way for my life to ever go back to the way it was and I think that in itself is amazing. I'm in no way saying that my childhood was sub-par, because honestly I believe that I had the very best upbringing any person can have. I don't mean to brag but my family kinda kicks ass! I'm just saying that I feel like a completely different person from the one I was upon leaving small town Delburne. I'm sure that I won't be viewed the same in the community and that really doesn't bother me all that much. I told my mom that I was worried about not fitting in when I got back and she told me that I never really fit in in the first place. This was probably the most reassuring thing I've heard in a very long time! I know that there's more out there in the world for me than there is in Delburne; this I've definitely realized in the past 7 months. I now have the confidence to find my own way in the world, all the while knowing that I have family and friends who will be there for me no matter what. That fact is the one that gives me the courage to live like there's no tomorrow and to never look back. I feel I need to express my undying gratitude to those people who have always been there and supported me; even when they don't agree with something I've done or a decision I've made (such as putting a hole in my face..) To my family; my parents, sisters, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins I want to say thank you for absolutely everything I am. You gave me the strength to remain true to me and what I believe is right. You gave me so much more love than I will ever know what to do with. You gave me the freedom to spread my wings while keeping a subtle hand underneath to catch me in case I fall. You gave me the morals and desire to make this world a better place for everyone. If it weren't for you then there wouldn't be me. Thank you.
To all my friends, the ones who have always believed that I can be anything I want to be; the ones who would take a punch for me or give one on my behalf; the ones who never cease to help me in and out of trouble. I know that I'm not always easy to be around or tolerate but I've never met a group of people who do a better job of it than you. You put up with my corny jokes and my twisted sense of humour. You tell me when I'm being less-than-intelligent. You listen to my random rants about trivial things. You help me work through problems that don't seem like problems to anyone but me. For this I want to say thank you! Even if I haven't seen you in 7 months you need know that I cherish our friendship and that just by being in my life you have enriched it to a point I would have imagined impossible. Thank you
To my teachers, formal and otherwise; I would like to say thank you for all the knowledge you have bestowed upon me. I am filled with the desire to learn as much as I can about the world and without your encouragement there would be no way that I wold possess this drive. You have provided me with the spark to take my learning into my own hands, on my terms. The spark which has now been stoked into a compelling determination to experience the world and everything it has to offer. I know that if I follow this flame my life and the lives around me will so much better than I could ever hope for. Thank you

Now that I've been all cheesy and sentimental I'd like to add a final thank you. This one isn't to any one person, place, thing or idea. This expression of gratitude is for Katimavik and everything that it is. If you ask 100 people about their experience with Katimavik; be it as a participant, parent, PL, billet family, work partner you will not once get the same response. Katimavik means so many different things to so many different people. It is an experience unlike any other. It has taught me higher degrees of patience, compassion, compromise, toleration, activism, respect, appreciation, individuality, adaptability, expression, and creativity. When I signed up for this experience I never expected to feel to closely tied to these people, a community or this planet. There were so many surprises and once in a lifetime experiences that I am overwhelmed. I'm sure I will still be realizing more things that Katimavik had taught me 50 years into the future.

Remember the past... look forward to the future... live in the now
<3

~Syd